Maybe It's Just Me...

Service Writer (SW): So what brings you in today?
Me: The top is leaking.
SW: When you wash the car?
Me: When I wash the car, when it rains, when anything more than the fine mist from a baby's warm breath gets anywhere near the area where the window meets the top.
SW: You know, convertibles often leak if you spray water directly on the area where the window meets the top.
Me: The car is two weeks old, and the top is already leaking.
SW: We can put some silicone on the weatherstripping. That should stop the leak.
Me: ....
Me: (2 days later) The top is leaking.

Service Manager (SM): So what brings you in today?
Me: There's a constant rattling noise coming from somewhere around the sunroof when I drive.
SM: (sitting in the car while parked) It doesn't seem to be making any noise now.
Me: The noise happens mainly when I drive.
SM: (pushing on the sunroof shade while still parked) I still don't hear anything.
Me: The noise happens mainly when I drive.
SM: You know, everyone's ears are different. You may hear very high tones that others can't hear.
Me: I've had ear problems all my life, I don't think that's the case.
SM: Yes, but you may be able to hear certain frequencies that others can't.
Me: ....

Salesman (S): It's a beautiful car isn't it?
Me: It is, but I notice that it has XM radio.
S: Yup, it does.
Me: I ordered Sirius.
S: Maybe there was a mistake and we accidentally ordered it with XM.
Me: The window sticker says Sirius.
S: Then how do you know it has XM?
Me: The display says XM - Hip Hop Nation.
S: ....
Me: ....

Salesman (S): So what do you think?
Me: (looking around inside the car) Where's the trunk release?
S: Oh, it doesn't have one. You just have to hit the button on the key fob.
Me: Are you serious? How does the car not have a trunk release?
S: They polled previous model year owners and found that they didn't really care about the trunk release.
Me: ....
S: Hey, _____ is giving you a car this nice for a great price. They have to cut some things out.
Me: ....

Service Writer (SW): So what brings you in today?
Me: The radiator is leaking and the truck is barely three years old.
SW: What makes you think there's a leak.
Me: Well that little green puddle is either following my wife around and laying underneath her truck when she parks, or the radiator is leaking.
SW: Yeah, that's a common problem with these. We can have the radiator, hoses, and lines replaced by this afternoon.
Me: Sh#t, how common is this problem!?!
Cashier: Your total comes out to $1,186.85. Will that be cash or charge?